May 2013
10 posts
blindguymcsqueezie:
ditch-able-prom-date:
thetableistryingtoeatme:
Shout out to all the religious kids who keep their beliefs to themselves in the middle of science class.
shout out also to the atheists who don’t shit on everyone else’s beliefs “because science”
shout out to everyone who is respectful about everyone elses beliefs
taeomi:
if i post things that you don’t like and you still follow me
i hope you find $20 on the ground today
2 tags
Why can’t I be charming and charismatic in scholarship interviews?
Instead I just sit there and smile like a blundering idiot.
i hate when applications are like “why do you want to work here”
because i need money
what do you want me to say omfg
I HAVE A PASSION FOR FROZEN YOGURT
3 tags
I check my messages on Tumblr every 2 minutes, just in case by some chance someone actually thought I was cool.
Or they got lost and needed directions…
3 tags
So last night I had to help chaperone an elementary school dance and I inadvertently started a Conga line.
Only time in my life I’ve ever been cool.
internetexplorers:
errorsanitynotfound:
internetexplorers:
why hasn’t anyone offered my parents 5 camels for my hand in marriage yet what am i doing wrong
its because you are worth at least 10 camels and they just cant afford you
this is the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me
April 2013
22 posts
vegan-because-fuck-you:
2 people sitting in front me on the bus were talking about how rude it is when people eavsdrop on others conversations and I told them that I totally agree.
toebyeas:
i wish opportunity would knock on my door but it’s always a jehova’s witness
7 tags
I get really tired of people saying that Disney movies teach little girls the wrong lessons in life.
Freaking Beauty and the Beast teaches you that you should love someone based on their personality, not their looks and that you shouldn’t ‘settle’ for things.
The Little Mermaid is all about stepping outside of your freaking comfort zone and making sacrifices to get the things...
3 tags
How the crap do I even have friends in the first place?
jesuschristvevo:
can i set up an arranged marriage for myself
2 tags
Ate part of a Hershey bar. Left the other 3/4 sitting in the wrapper on a notebook on my bed.
Accidentally left laptop on said chocolate bar. Chocolate soup.
First world probs.
4 tags
What if I child’s eye color was the combination of their parents’ rather than the dominant eye color of the two…
Trying to sneak up on a friend
sodamnrelatable:
Expectation:
Reality:
duffiethedirectioner:
thorki-hiddlesworth:
carlilemysaviour:
but actually what if you were on a plane and an actor sat beside you for like a five hour flight like what does one do in that situation
i just died
I so wonder why Allison is posting all of these bucket list pictures…?
Welcome to the ProcrastiNATION.
i-o-u-a-fall:
nooby-banana:
farareusis:
angeldicks:
pants with fake pockets
suit jackets with fake pockets
FAKE POCKETS
~HOT POCKETS~
hellotoyoumylove asked: Thanks for the follow :) AHH your blog is awesomeeeeeeeeeee!~
catswithbenefits:
if no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it than how bad of a decision can it really be
March 2013
14 posts
jesuschristvevo:
i love when girls think other girls are copying them because they dye their hair the same color like you did not invent red hair
personallyvictimizedbymalik:
amoying:
actual-slut-artemis-fowl:
amoying:
things that shouldn’t exist:
body hair
acne
getting sick
bad things happening to good people
olives
what the fuck did olives ever do to you
olives killed my family
I’m sorry for your loss
3 tags
Wore my hair in a tight ponytail too long.
I imagine this is how it feels to be dropped from the Empire State Building onto your head.
Ow.
2 tags
Pease excuse my passing vacuum.
1 tag
Do you think there are any hipster-hipsters out there?
That push up their glasses and are all like, “I was a hipster before being a hipster was cool.”
Hipster-ception.
My dad and I were talking about the Harry Potter...
smashleightea:
2 tags
Anybody else a natural flirt without meaning to be?
It really comes back to bite you sometimes…
braydaaan:
Do you ever go on YouTube thinking you’ll just be on to watch a quick music video then later you find yourself watching a tutorial on how to walk a mother fucking giraffe.
4 tags
If you read “The Ugly Ducking” backwards, you’d get the story of my life.
Last day of 17...
February 2013
10 posts
carryonmywincestson:
school has just taught me so many helpful life lessons
like i don’t know what a mortgage is or how it works or what a tax refund is and how you even do taxes
but i know how to graph an imaginary number on a coordinate plane
4 tags
So, when I’m not driving I usually sit cross-legged in the passenger seat and sing to myself/whoever’s driving.
This is one of the many reason that I’m single.
